Dreams vs. Drama: The Realities of an All-Girls College!

Remember how we all imagined our college life as this wild Bollywood blockbuster? Picture this: dramatic slow-mo entrances, hair flips that could put any shampoo ad to shame, and epic love stories unfolding under twinkling lights.

Fast forward to reality and turn out my gold medal worthy procrastination and series of questionable life choices that landed me in a gender specific soap opera, “Jaha Romance Toh Kya, Delivery Wale Bhaiya Bhi Gate Se Andr Nahi Aate The.”

Samajh rahe ho! SAMAJH RAHE HO!!! (Sorry for exaggerating!)

Forget Siddharth Malothra at this point I was just hoping to find wifi and enough motivation to shower.  So, gather round, my friends, as I regale you with tales that’ll have you cringing with love and laughing at my misadventures.

But chalo galti insaan se hoti hai aur hum sab mutually hurt hai.

The Adoption Saga

Day one of college, and shocker! I got adopted by a group of girls I barely knew from school. I thought I was stepping into friendship paradise, butttttttt BRO little did I know, I was signing up for six months of collective CAT FIGHT  trauma and the most dramatic friendship breakup since Ross and Rachel.

Our batch was like a biryani of girls from different states each with a unique flavour. “Why leave your home for this circus? we’d ask wide-eyed. Turns out we were all mutually confused like a bunch of desi kids dropped in the middle of a K-Drama with complicated college stress.

The Morning Views

8:30 AM in the morning lectures, and these girls are all shiny and glittery, like they were about to walk the Cannes red carpet. Highlighters in one hand, blush in the other, and THE JHUMKAZZ swinging like they were in a dance-off. I could barely peel myself off my beloved Harvard sweatshirt and grey sweatpants! Meanwhile, they had a perfect catwalk with handbags so pricey, I was convinced they were crafted from unicorn tears, totally the tiniest and the most useless bags in the history of bags for carrying textbooks!

Enters THE PIDDI

And then there was THE PIDDI. NOPE!! Not naming names!!

What if she finds out?  We don’t promote BEEF….. sooooo

You know the type: the I-know-it-all convent girl. Piddi stood at a solid five feet but had the audacity of a 6'4" giant! She’d greet professors with neck bends that looked like she was auditioning for a role as a human PRETZEL

And don’t get me started on her TONE! Casual questions morphed into epic monologues. “What’s the capital of France?” would turn into, “Let me elucidate the socio-political history of Paris, woven with post-colonial perspectives that would make even Oxford question its entire existence.”

Where is this TED Talk coming from? WE all would question.

The High-Maintenance Queens

If you thought Dil Chahta Hai and Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara represented real life well, we only have Kamolikas and Naagins neeche gali gali here, where the only dance we knew was dodging high-maintenance queens who wouldn’t share notes.

If you passed a class, it was like winning the lottery. “Oh, you passed? Congrats! But don’t expect me to share my notes, let's keep this cutthroat!”

As I sat in class, contemplating my life choices and where it all went wrong, I realised: maybe I wasn’t cut out for the Bollywood dream. I was living in a sitcom where even the punchlines had more drama than any romantic lead could.

So here I am, navigating this rollercoaster of academia, procrastination, and the occasional existential crisis. If you’re hoping for romance, well, let’s just say my biggest love affair has been with the campus coffee machine.

One thing I am glad about is at least we don’t have to bear the unbearable sweat smell, (nope no one is saying boys smell) BUT THESE GIRLIES HAD CHANEL ON…. OKIEEE

See you in the next one...

Toodles!!

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